In Love and Lonely

In Love and Lonely

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Time:

06:15 am

Maria, My Sisiter and I went to go get My Sister fish yesterday? Yea, she really wanted some pet fish, so we got her four.

She named them

Blinky
Pinky
Inky
Clyde

After the Pacman ghosts.

Damn, I taught her well.

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Time:

06:31 pm

I went out for lunch with Maria today and we just walked around downtown looking for somewhere to eat and there was this person with a hoodie on, and I only glanced at her for a second, but when I looked at Maria she looked pissed. And when I asked her what was wrong she was just like boiling, she says, look at the bitches hoodie! and on the back it had a peace sign and around it, it said PEACE THROUGH SUPERIOR FIREPOWER. and some anti libby site on the bottom.

Maria wanted to fucking kill her.

I dont think I would have stopped her.

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Time:

01:39 pm

HOLY CRAP! I DONT HAVE TO GO TO LONDON! FUCK YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!

I called up my manager and gave him the BIGGEST sob story ever and told him that I just wasnt ready for this and he was like, I totally understand and he said he was surprised I took the offer to begin with and blah blah and he said he was going to make some calls and see what he could do.

2 hours later...

I get a really funky ass number on my cell and its someone from Disney telling me that they dont officially bind their contracts till the month before i start working, so basically the papers that have been ruining my life have just been sitting in a sort through basket for all this time. They said with the proper signatures they could cancel the whole deal.

YESSSS

So about an hour after that the scout that found me to begin with called me. He said that he was really disappointed to hear that I wasnt taking up the offer but understands. He said he is proud of how I sort my priorities and how its a rare thing to find an actor like that. He also said that when I am ready, to send him something and he will always be willing to give me whatever he could. He also said that instead of cancelling the whole contract, they wanted to know if I culd still do a little something for them from April till the first week of June, which I agreed to. So They are just modifying it.

It was soooo awesome!

How perfect!

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Time:

05:35 pm

Your Dominant Intelligence is Linguistic Intelligence

You are excellent with words and language. You explain yourself well.
An elegant speaker, you can converse well with anyone on the fly.
You are also good at remembering information and convicing someone of your point of view.
A master of creative phrasing and unique words, you enjoy expanding your vocabulary.

You would make a fantastic poet, actor, journalist, writer, teacher, lawyer, politician, or translator.

What Kind of Intelligence Do You Have?

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Time:

02:48 pm

For any of you who are having a hard time in your life, or are giving up on yourself, and have convinced yourself that your life is just...nothing. I really really really suggest you see the movie SAW. As suspencful and extreme as it may be, i think everyone leaves with a new outlook on life. Even I, who tried to keep a positive outlook on life and always tell myself that I am doing all this for something, came out with the weirdest vibe.

I went to the movie with Maria and her friend. It was really good.

Last night however, had to be, not only one of the contenting, but the best night of my life.
Maria has been so down lately, and she wont talk to me, and wouldnt tell me why. Yesterday afternoon after her brother told her to *cry about it* when she said she needed the cell phone they share for that night, she actually did. She just started balling. She closed the door to her room, leaving her brother with a strong unhurt impression, then that same strong ~~girl~~ woman who closed the door on him, pressed her back against the back of the same door, and fell to the ground in tears. I knew it wasnt just him that made her cry, it was just that little something that pushed her off the side, and she broke down. She sat and cried for about 20 minutes. I kept asking what was wrong and she would say nothing. It really fusterated me to the point where I told her since she wasnt letting me help, that she would have to figure out things on her own and take some time to think by herself. As I left, I heard her sobbing get louder. It hurt so bad!

Later that night, I was talking to Marias friend, Brittany, and she said Maria gave her a nice list of things that was wrong. It bugged me that she told Brittany, and not me, but then I came to understand that she was trying to put on that same front to me, and she was with her brother. She doesnt like to admit she is not *normal* and has problems that other people dont. I dont think she understands, that there is no such thing as a normal person in normal situations.

I decided to go back to see her and make sure she was okay, because from the sound of Brittanys IMs and the IMs she had with me, she sounded like a wreck. And When i got there, that is what I found. That most beauriful wreck I have ever seen at that. At first she was saying how she doesnt know why I came back because there is nothing wrong, she was just really tired, which turned out to be quite the opposite. Once I got her talking, she cried, and we talked together for hours. I made me feel SO AMAZING to see her get rid of everything, and just pour it all out.

I remember before I left i was talking to Brittany, telling her OMG I dont know what to say to her. It turned out, that she didnt need words at all. She just needed someone to care, and someone to listen. To return the thoughtfullness that she gives to so many people daily.

And even though she totally broke down, I see her as so much more of a stronger person now, just because I know there is no weakness in her that I dont know of, and I know that what she presents to me is what she truely is.

Why is she so awesome, and why do I love her so much??

Dont get me started.

Anyway
go see Saw
Its good
Watch Fosters Home for Imaginary friends this week.
Im in it.

Thats all for today!
Out!

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Time:	06:09 pm
Current Mood:	blah

Im so afraid to call my girlfriend tonight. I know she is going t be devistated about the outcome of the election and that it was her very state that decided it. She has been kind of indifferent about everything lately, and as optimistic, and as much as I try to be a supportive boyfriend, she always seems like she is missing something. I dont know what it is, its like I know I could say something that would fill that space, but I dont know what it is. I hope she is doing okay 9-/

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